Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Episode from A Violent Past

This frustration that bubbles up
weakens me with its heat.
This hatred that flares so bright
attacks my heart with steady beat.

I want to bite you, scratch you, hurt you.
I want to fight you, tease you, rip you.
I want your heart to bleed and your soul to bruise.
I want to kill you so badly, this is no ruse.

I will stab you and rip out your spine
I will halt the heart that is no longer mine.
I will drive bone splinters deep into your brain.
I will make you scream out in pain.

I can see the tears sliding down your cheek.
I can feel horror at this havoc I wreak.
I can tell you this is all your fault.
I can love yet never halt.

Built to Live

Built for a purpose, or to take up space?
Built to participate in life's great race.
Built to fit into someone's idea
Of what you are doing and why you are here.

Live for a reason or live for the thrill.
Live to be different or go through the drill.
Live because living is all you can do,
To die, you have to first live too.

In my head

Yes, there are places I wouldn't go.
But not many.
There are some places I hate.
More than any.
All are inside my mind
Places but few can find.

When I'm there I'm alone.
Yet surrounded.
I hear voices and echoes.
I scream for quiet and they subside.
Yet their presence slowly grows
Until I'm overwhelmed.

They are a part of me.
Yet they act on their own.
I am a colour.
They are my tone.
I am blind and they can't see
Fumbling in the darkness blindly.

Yet their incessant chidings grate upon me.
I am slipping.
Doing as they say.
I know I must be mad.
Or are the voices a seperate entity
Individual from my sanity.

Do as I say
Do as I command
You are but a bird
I am but the hand

Is it I who speaks?
I can no longer tell.

Abyss

The abyss is not just a place
it's a feeling
Bringing with it the cold you feel
when you're alone
but you aren't

Many have fallen into this other
this lack of being
The loudest sound is that of your heart
Stopping
Or maybe the lack of breathing
so painfully loud in its absence.

So scream, panic
A passerby might hear your silence
as the echoes of the abyss rebound inside your head.

Or use this nothing
fill it with
Something
Make it yours
and watch the flow of emptiness in the air
as it materialises

This is where I go
This is where I dream
Here I am safe from the nightmares that haunt me
Here
I can lose myself
Here
I don't exist

New Years 2009 Sam on guitar, Soph on lyrics

Told to compose a song within an hour with Sam, I did the lyrics assuming that a male would be singing, however in the end I did. Not sure where the recording is. I'm okay with being into girls though.

Walkin along the beach pretendin it's her street

Feelin dark inside, thinkin of last night
I called her, just to hear her say no again...
Walking slowly, ever further from the light.

I'm at the beach, she's scared of love
She's out of reach and I'm fallin, fallin, fallin
Without her I'm asleep, dead to the world,
Her smile can wake my soul, my girl.

Singing to a lamp post, pretendin it's her window
Feelin sad inside, thinkin of last year
I called her, just to ask her to the movies
Singin loudly, empty words to hide my fear.

I'm at the beach, she's scared of love
She's out of reach and I'm fallin, fallin, fallin
Without her I'm asleep, dead to the world,
Her smile can wake my soul, my girl.

Runnin from the beach, pretendin it's my whole life
Feelin lost inside, thinkin of tomorrow
I'll call her, just to say I love you
But it's no nightmare, her ears were hollow

I'm at the beach, she's scared of love
She's out of reach and I'm fallin, fallin, fallin
Without her I'm asleep, dead to the world,
Her smile can wake my soul, my girl...

Pygmalion

Meant to be a lyrical poem/song

He fell in love with an ice cold princes

He fell in love with a heart so dead
She said to him “go and mind your business”
I’ll never love you, so she said

She didn’t feel like love was important
She only cared for things and places
All of her friends were getting married
And when she sleeps she sees their faces

In her mind, she could never find
One good reason for you.
But in her in heart, she could understand
Why these days she felt so blue.
So she took your hand, knew you wouldn’t reprimand
When she said what she was feeling
She claimed her love, in the name of all above
And he thought that he was dreaming

She fell in love with a man not business
She fell in love with a boy so blind
He couldn’t see all her flaws, just kindness
And if he could she knew he wouldn’t mind

He knew she was the only one for him
He only cared for her sweet smile
All of his friends thought he was stupid
They thought the girl wasn’t worth his while

In her mind, she could never find
One good reason for you.
But in her in heart, she could understand
Why these days she felt so blue.
So she took your hand, knew you wouldn’t reprimand
When she said what she was feeling
She claimed her love, in the name of all above
And he thought that he was dreaming

Dancing to your tune

Old scribbling:

My heart is beating to your song

and I'm dancing to your tune
I long for us to be together,
soon can never be too soon

My cheeks blush at your smile
and I'm falling in your eyes
If you said I love you,
mine would widen in surprise

My minds in love with your words,
my hearts completely yours
I know my eyes say I love you
As my body opens doors